Exhausted in the middle

Below is the the Oxfords Dictionary description & definition of exhaustion.

ex·haus·tion

noun

1. 1. a state of extreme physical or mental fatigue. extreme tiredness, over tiredness, fatigue, weariness, lack of energy enervation debilitation, debility, faintness, prostration,enfeeble-men
2. 2. the action or state of using something up or of being used up completely.

In the middle of life with all things good and bad is a place where God takes an examination of your heart after you’ve said yes to the calling. As I stand in the middle, with no desire to go back & exhausted from the journey I feel completely used up. As my body is trying to recover from the years of preparation & a full day’s drive, the physical exhaustion has become a playground of the enemy. Toying with my thoughts & emotions, raising questions of security & stability, bigger tasks, deeper asks. As I stand up to catch a breath, I cry in frustration at the thought of how much further we still must go. The final blow causes me to wonder, just wonder, did we make the right choice?

The wondering thought has become a slap in the face to my Father who has set me apart to complete a task that I said yes to. Forgetting all He has done to bring me to this point, perfectly packaging this place, our home in the middle of the thorns, knowing I still had work. Yet his Grace, His Grace IS sufficient for me. I got this realization as I’m almost to the end of one chapter, dropping idols God brings to my mind. There is no room for me if I am going to participate in God’s redemptive work. How I feel & what I want are second to my calling. With my eyes I wondered how this will work instead of thanking God for what He placed in my hands.

The enemy will use what he can to cause us to doubt what God spoke over our lives. When one is exhausted it becomes harder to stay focused, remain calm, make healthy decisions & regulate emotions. It’s like having all the tools to complete a task yet they are jumbled as we scramble to recognize if what we see is an illusion or truth.

How many times am I going to pick up what God is supposed to carry? Oh God, forgive me for my unbelief, I do not want to wander for any more time. This blog is full of raw feelings as I walk towards my promise.

Friends, if we are not careful, our wondering will turn to wandering and the control & unbelief we want so desperately to hold on to will be the very idols that keep us from our promise land. Physical & mental exhaustion require rest to recover, letting go to allow God to do what only he can do requires surrender, COMPLETE surrender.

In your exhaustion don’t allow the enemy to steal your promise, when you think you can’t go any further, take one more step. Your breakthrough is just around the corner.

My question to you is, what Idols are keeping you from the promise land?

Be encouraged!